Summary: two shorts that walked into my head and demanded to be written, angst (sort of)
Author: c'est moi bien sur
You never say I love you, even when I cry
I scream and shout and sob and shake
But you never open your mouth
It's so hard for you to utter those three little words
It would mean the world to me but you can't do it can you?
As we lie in that bed in an old abandoned room and you stroke me and your fingers slide across my skin.
You'll whisper my name as if it were a prayer.
But never those three words that I so long to hear.
When you brush your lips everywhere on my body, and whisper sinful things into my ear.
I shudder and quake with pleasure but inside I'm dying.
Your fingers will touch me where none others are allowed.
Sliding into my very deepest core.
You make me scream.
You make me weep.
I feel as if I'm dying.
I'm writhing beneath you.
But is it enough?
Can you tell me what I so sincerely want to hear?
Still more you take from me, as our bodies are made one.
As you slide into me and devour even more of my being.
And I scream your name.
Can you even whisper those words?
As I gave you my virtue and allowed you to desecrate my body
And offered my purity to the fickle spirit of Love
Submitting my body and mind to you
Did you tell me then?
Can you face me in the day?
When we are as we were born, two seperate entities?
When the sunlight rules sovereign and all truths are exposed?
When we carry our secret close to our hearts and I can almost forget this exquisite torture?
More and more I give myself to you
And like a void you are never full
Satisfied that you have me trapped likea bird within a cage
Begging you to set me free and yet wanting desperately to stay
Your silence is my prison
And your words will be my death
Please send me to the beyond and end our affair
Because always I am breathlessly running
Reaching out towards you whose back is always turned.
It's dark and I can't see your face, but I know what you look like in my mind.
I see you there, lying prone amongst an expanse of white, your swarthy skin standing out like a beacon.
You aren't speaking coherently, you're breathing very hard, your lips are parted slightly and dark with the force of my love.
Your head is thrown to the side, wild ebony locks like a dark cloud, silky and soft to the touch, gleaming dully in the flickering candlelight.
It's been a few days since you've had any sort of cleaning so your body is shining and I can smell your very basest of scents, it's lovely, it's so you.
Your eyes are half closed, lids heavy with dark eyelashes; the greenest of green gleams from beneath them, bleary with exhaustion and perhaps defeat.
You're beautiful like this, silent and forgiving, pliant in my hands.
You take all of me within you and even more.
When I want to tear you, to break you, to make you bleed, you silently accept my brutal embrace.
Open yourself more to me and let me see your tears.
More and more I want to possess you, even on the brink of death you're lovely.
Like a rose that is blooming slowly within my hands, I want you to open more.
Though I take you again and again you never reject me.
When I love you slowly, quickly, roughly, all is the same.
You just look at me with those half open eyes.
And more and more I want you, all of you.
Though you've always been stubborn and resisted me.
You're beautiful like this...in the dark where your eyes can't reach me.
In the dark where all I can hear are echos of the agony you bore.
Where your forgiving body receives me but your eyes condemn me.
Where I may shed tears of repentance and beg to be Saved.
It's quiet for now...I can watch you breathing slowly, as if you're calm, as if you know its over.
I want you...all of you...I've broken you mind and body...and I still don't have you.
And though I may go to confession, all I can ask for won't bring you back.
I love you...
And I'll live bearing this blood stained cross for all the rest of my days.